Updates!!

So as we all know I am the worst blogger in the history of the world. Ok great now that we’ve established this time for some updates….

First off on my list….
14. No soda for a year – Well its been a month, so one down and 11 to go. I started on August 1, 2010.
31. Take a picture for everyday of my senior year – Well so far this hasn’t gone as well as it should but I’m working on it… I have given up facebook so I can’t put the ones I do have up yet, but they will be soon!
35. Give up social medai for a week – Well I only have a few more hours!! I gave it up last Monday and have much to my surprise been much more productive!
44. Create a budget and stick to it for a year! – This is done!! (Actually just the budget is, but now we wait for a year) So next August. I have to be honest my budget I made is AWESOME! I’m really pleased with it. Can’t wait to post a picture of it for yall to see.
50. Buy some toms -  This is done!! They are gray and I’m in love. Most comfortable shoes ever!!!!!!! I had to buy mens to get the color I wanted from the store so they are a little wide but I think that thats part of the comfort. Picture to follow.
54. Color through a coloring book – I’m in the process. Its full of princesses and awesome. Enough said.
85. Update my blog tracking my journey – As we all know this isn’t going well…..

In addition to my list God has just blessed me so much this semester. I am thoroughly enjoying my semester so far. I love my roommatesso much and am so blessed to have them. I’m loving having Lauren back in my life. I have a great job, hanging out with two sweet little girlsin the afternoons. I’ve been fortunate enought to watch God work in my circle of friends lives and its been awesome. We’ve had some bumpy times but God’s hand is so evident in it all that I’m daily amazed by His grace and the blessings he’s given me! I will definitey update more later. I’m currently spending time with Bree and Lauren who came home with me for the weekend. Its been an amazing weekend of fellowship!!

refreshed

hello blogging world. i have done a horrible job keeping this updated. however i have an excellent reason as to why but we’ll get to that later…

on an interesting note, once again my dad was in the paper and in court and the number of people reading quadrupled overnight. i myself find this quite amusing. (for those of you who don’t know, my dad was sentenced to 20 years).  on one hand it kind of makes me sad that that many people are interested in the negative things in my life. on the other hand it gives me an amazing opportunity to tell you have strength in God……

20 years is a long time. i myself cannot fathom how long that is. i will hopefully have a family and kids by then (but God is constantly surprsing me with what he has in store so who knows). if he serves the whole sentence when he gets out he will have spent almost half my life in jail and over half of wilson’s life. this blows my mind. if this had happened 4 years ago it would have completely crumbled my foundation. but it hasn’t. I rest in the fact that God isn’t going to give me anything that I can’t handle with his help. He’s overcome everything. And let’s face it our life on earth is just a tiny blip of eternity. so my advice to people going through a difficult time is to simply call on God. I find it so freeing to know that he’s in control and I don’t have to worry about anything.

“It is God who arms me with strength and makes my way perfect. He makes my feet like the feet of a deer; he enables me to stand on the heights. He trains my hands for battle; my arms can bend a bow of bronze.” Psalm 18:32-34

God doesn’t promise that when you choose to follow him it will be easy. He promises to be there, love you unconditionally, and to help get you through. Temptations and struggles will always pop up but nothing will be thrown at you that you can’t handle with him.

My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus’ blood and righteous;
No merit of my own I claim
But wholly lean on Jesus’ name.
On Christ, the solid rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

When darkness veils his lovely face,
I ret on his unchanging grace;
In every high and story gale
My anchor holds within the veil.
On Christ, the solid rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

His oath, his covenant, his blood
Sustain me in the raging flood;
When all supports are washed away,
He then is all my hope and stay.
On Christ, the solid rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

When he shall come with trumpet sound,
Oh, may I then in him be found,
Clothed in his righteousness alone,
Redeemed to stand before the throne!
On Christ, the solid rock, I stand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

i was fortunate enough to chaperone my church’s youth group mission trip. and let me tell you i fell in love with the youth. i absolutely loved seeing God work in their lives and getting to know them. if i could i would still be in Florida with them.

unfortunately i have to go get ready for lunch with a sweet friend. but i will post later about the trip!

choppy waters

lately i’ve been having a really rough time. i don’t know how to describe it other than a ‘funk’. i’ve been struggling to do anything (work out, read my Bible, pray, work) but be lazy. sloth should be my middle name at this point. i feel a bit like i’m on a boat stuck out at sea in really choppy waters. getting slammed down over over while be tossed around. i want to be joyful and energetic but its been hard.

i dunno what my problem is. i’ve really been struggling with my dad. i’m the only one that talks to him and the only one that goes to visit and i think i’m putting pressure on myself about. i don’t have to talk to him or visit him, but i do want to. however, i’ve been struggling to make sure that i’m not looking for my validation in him (i used to really want it, but i know that i don’t need it at all)  i think my funk came from being so alone in mt. pleasant. at school i’m surrounded by people i love and who love me. i have amazing friends who are constantly pushing me towards God. i’m also in a routine at school (for those who know  me know i absolutely love routine and structure). here i’ve been lazy and haven’t done much of anything and my schedule is constantly changing. so i think if i make a routine for myself i’ll feel better. i should be able to push myself towards God, but when i’m here alone its pretty easy to let Satan in and admit defeat. especially working in a restaraunt (well atleast the one i work at) i’m constantly surrounded by people talking about sex, drinking, and drugs. i’m honestly not interested in most of that but it is definitely a huge temptation.

so the climax of my ‘funk’ consisted of me yelling at my mom and bawling my eyes out. i have the best mom ever. laid on the floor with my head in her lap while she played with my hair and read to me from Psalms. it was so calming and so amazing. 

so today i start my summer anew. i’ve got a schedule made. i’m taking a break on reading the bible in order so i can read stuff that really feeds me in where i am right now. i’m going to start excercising regularly (i love to exercise it gives me time to think). and set aside some God time everyday. i’ve recently started reading this book called Too Busy Not to Pray by Bill Hybels. Its amazing I highly reccommend it.

i feel very refreshed and excited to see what God has in store for me the rest of the summer!

i hope everyone is enjoying there summer.

home

i am back in mt pleasant and home for the summer.
this is the earliest i’ve ever been done and i’m loving it.
unfortunately its been cloudy and raining so i can’t enjoy the outdoors but i’ve gotten lots done indoors

i’m really looking forward to this summer. things i’m look forward too..

1. friend visits: super exciting! maria, and possible kristen and bree are coming for my birthday weekend. my lovely lifegroup ladies will be visiting more than once. daniel claims to be coming which will be fun. and several other people are up in the air. regardless lots of fun visits where i can show Charleston off
2. babysitting: i love babysitting! i’m already fairly booked for a few weeks.
3. travel: i have the privilege of chaperoning Lighthouse’s youth mission trip. I’m looking foward to getting to know the kids and talking about how awesome Jesus is and working at a special needs camp. i’m also going on a family vaca which is long overdue and very big for us. we havent traveled in 4 years so this will be fun!
4. working at TGIFriday: what can i say i love it there. not sure why. the people are unique and i love the atmosphere. haha
5. working on my list!
6. spending lots of time with Jesus: i’m excited about all the free time i’m going to have to Sabbath and spend time with Him. I hope to grow and learn lots!

on a more serious note… i’m going to visit my dad tonight. i’m a little nervous. ok well a lot. i’m also not sure what to wear haha. never thought about what one wears to visit a jail. whats appropriate? not sure. any suggestions?

until next time..

almost done

i am almost done with my junior year.

this is mind-blowing and terrifying.
what am i going to do when i’m done… anything God wants me to. but its still scary to almost be done with school and be in the real world. eeek!

this year has been amazing. i have been incredibly blessed. and truly in awe of everything God has done for me my junior year. let me share somethings…

1. A car. I haven’t had a car since high school. since i was living off campus i needed one this year so i could work and have transportation. this is either said than done. this past summer my mom and i looked all over the place for a car and something was always a little off. well my first day in the woodlands i was alone, without a car, and my roommates weren’t coming for a while. well I got a call and this man I NEVER MET had a car i could borrow for free until he could find me one to buy. Umm whoa! Totally a God thing. TUrns out he goes to Midtown too and his inlaws live next to my grandparents. Well this was a huge blessing and completely flabbergasted me at the kindness and giving hearts that people have. He then found me a new car for a huge discount. and that is how i bought my own car.
2. I got a job. Looking for a job was insanely hard. it took me a while to find one. and the one I did God put me in for a reason. Acts 17:26 it was really cool to work in an environment and be able to share God with people. it was a hard place to work and i really struggle through it but i’m so thankful for the job and the opportunity to get to work!
3. He brought my family through madness in one piece. Enough said. i can honestly say that my family would not have survived the last four years without him. I am so thankful for each thing that happened. and all the incredible people he put in my life pointing me back to him!
4. my life group. they are a huge blessing. we have recently gotten really close. and we have our ups and downs but it is so awesome to have a group of Jesus loving girls to talk to whenever i need too. i love each of them and have learned alot from each and everyone of them. i love them all!!
5. friends. i finally have some amazing friends. they are all wonderful. some shout outs (haha) ms. maria is constantly there to point me back to God and hold me accountable. she listens to me and gives advice and always holds me accountable which is something i totally need! i love her. i also have tons of other people God has blessed me with who i’ve spent the year getting to know and love. and i’m so thankful to have friends!

these are just a few of the incredible things God has done for me. i’m truly in awe of this last year. hope you enjoyed my walk down memory lane ….

life

strangely enough my blog had the most views i’ve ever had on tuesday. coincidence? probs not. chances are when my life became public once again and hit the paper tuesday morning people who are curious about my life went to see if i had blogged about it. i had not. but i will now…

this past monday my father was supposed to be sentenced. yes i know oooo scary. but i was and still am at complete peace about it. unfortunately my father decided to run away. as far as we’ve been told he’s still missing. the only reason i am sharing this with all of you is because i want you to know how incredibly AWESOME God has been through all of this.

i may not understand why stuff like this happens. but i know that this is ulitimately going to bring God glory and thats really all that matters. my faith has grown so much in just a week. there is a reason this is happening and eventhough i’ll never know what it is or why i’m ok. i’m great. i have a God that loves me and has rescued me. there is nothing that can break me as long as i have God. i’m human and incredibly selfish so i’m going to make mistakes and run but He’ll still be there pursuing and loving me.

my dad is missing. i do love him and wish i knew where he is. but God is in complete control of the situation. i am not. i have nothing to worry about.

it has been a hard week. and i have had my struggles. but i have amazing people pointing me back to Jesus so nothing else can get in the way.

i am blessed enough to have a God that loves me and cares for me. it has been incredibly amazing to get to share Jesus’s love for us to others through this. to many of my non believing friends they have struggled to see why i’m so ok with all of this. ITS BECAUSE I HAVE JESUS. not for any other reason. i tried to get through this when it all first started on my own and it doesnt work. i’m so thankful for the last 4 years that have led up to this point and brought me to were i am.

so even if you are reading this because you’re simply curious about the case and whats going on with my dad…know that you can get through ANYTHING with God. and he wants to be there for you too.

“When I am afriad, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I trust and am not afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?” Psalm 56:3-4

“I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us.” Romans 8:18

tomorrow

tomorrow is the day.
its the day that brings closure to the last 4 years of my families lives.

i’m scared.

yet relieved.

i’m scared for him. i’m not really upset for myself. i just cant even begin to imagine how he feels. tomorrow he loses all control over his life for how ever long they tell him. that would terrify me. and yes i’m still a little hurt by our conversation wednesday but  i still love him. i cant fathom how he feels right now. i know he feels alone and hurt and scared. and that makes me hurt for him (i can empathize with people to an almost unhealthy level, hence why i’m still can’t watch movies where people die without crying for their loved ones)

i’m also relieved. i’m relieved because this will bring closure. it means we finally have a timeline on how long this will affect us. it means we can move on.

don’t get me wrong, i wouldnt change anything about the last 4 years. but let me say this, I’m so freaking excited its over. it has brought me where i am today. it has brought me to God. I couldn’t have survived without God and rest knowing that nothing will be that bad again. He has brought me the most amazing friends I’ve ever had who point me back to God everyday. I thank God for them everyday.

so as tomorrow approaches and the knots in my stomache get tighter i’m reminded of how much God loves me and how this is all bringing him glory. though I can’t see how and don’t understand why, it doesnt matter. its for him and thats good enough for me!

“When I am afraid, I put my trust in you. In God, whose word I praise, in God I  trust and am not afraid. What can mere mortals do to me?” Psalm 56:3-4
(so tuesday when it hits the newspapers and people text, message, and call to tell me they’ve seen it and when everyone’s talking about it I will remember that the things they do and say to try and hurt us don’t matter. God loves me and has brought me out of this and He’s not gonna leave so the hurt doesn’t matter)

“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you…And the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, after you have suffered a little while, will himself restore you and make you strong, firm, and steadfast.” 1Peter 5:7, 10

“The Lord is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble. Those who know your name trust in you, for you, Lord, have never forsaken those who seek you.” Psalm 9:9-10

a.j.

All 3 of my Faithful Followers :)

Currently I’m working on…

4. read through the Bible

14. No soday for a year

57. Growing my hair out

85. Update the blog to track my progress (well i’m trying )

Slowly but surely I shall get it all done!

This weekend I just worked. I’m constantly reminding myself to be thankful for my job. I’m lucky to have a job. This week I’m going to start my goal of going to the gym regularly wish me luck!

I have been inspired by http://dayzeroproject.com/ . It is a unique challenge that inspires you to set and achieve your personal goals in life. I love the idea of setting a timeline to accomplish many things that I have always wanted to accomplish. The aim of the challenge is to complete 101 preset tasks in 1001 days. Tasks must be specific (ie. no ambiguity in the wording) with a result that is either measurable or clearly defined. Tasks must also be realistic and stretching (ie. represent some amount of work on your part).

I plan on updating my experience along the way for whoever out there in cyber world wants to read!

My 1001 days will end Wednesday, December 5, 2012.

So here are my goals:
     Things I’m working on
     Things that are done

1. watch all 82 academy award best pictures (0/82)
2. run the cooper river bridge run
3. visit somewhere tropical (not Florida)
4. read through the Bible
5. Run an 8 minute mile
6. volunteer weekly for a year at a children’s hospital (0/52)
7. read 100 new books (0/100)
8. get straight As in grad school
9. Have $3,000 in savings
10. Tithe every pay check
11. relearn to play the piano
12. Take tap again
13. Give up elevators for a month (4 weeks, consecutively) (0/4)
14. No soda for a year
15. Pay off my credit card
16. learn to ballroom dance
17. go on a mission trip out of the country
18. go to the gym consistently for 6 months (4 times a week) (0/4)(0/4)(0/6)
19. go a week without TV (0/7)
20. memorize a Bible verse a week for a year (0/52)
21. send out Christmas cards
22. make my t-shirt quilt
23. learn to sew
24. go on a mother daughter trip
25. go on a road trip with Wilson
26. cook my way through a cookbook
27. visit a new state
28. get my belly button pierced
29. get a tattoo
30. take a picture of all 101 events (0/101)
31. take a picture everyday of my senior year
32. go up in a hot air balloon
33. raise $1,000 for Dance Marathon
34. no fast food for 3 months (0/3)
35. No social media for a week (0/7)
36. Find a new hobby
37. Do 101 nice things for strangers (0/101)
38. Start a novel on the past 4 years of my life
39. Watch a movie for every letter: ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ
40. Read a book for every letter: ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ
41. Throw 5 parties (0/5)
42. Send a smile once a month (0/35)
43. Visit 20 new restaurants (0/20)
44. Create a budget and stick to it for a year
45. Watch all Gilmore Girls episodes in one weekend
46. Run a 5k
47. Lose 20 lbs
48. Work up to 50 push ups
49. Work up to 100 push ups
50. Buy some Toms
51. Watch 20 old movies I’ve always wanted to see (0/20)
52. Watch The Passion
53. Have a Harry Potter Movie day
54. Color an entire coloring book
55. Join a book club
56. Paint 5 pictures worth framing (0/5)
57. Grow my hair out
58. Go on a vacation by myself
59. Watch the sunrise and the sunset on the same day
60. Have my own etsy store!
61. Be able to do splits again
62. Dance with someone in the rain
63. Give only home made gifts for a year
64. Run a 10k
65. Take a trapeze class
66. Go to a spa with my mom
67. Give myself a pedicure once a month
68. put a puzzle together by myself in a week
69. Go camping
70. Stay in a nice hotel for a night away and order room service
71. Send out birthday cards
72. Go to a drive in movie theater
73. Go skinny dipping (and not end up in the emergency room)
74. Participate in operation Christmas child every Christmas
75. Leave a 50% tip
76. Learn to change oil
77. Learn to change a tire
78. Get a pet
79. Buy an IPAD
80. Get CPR certified
81. Write a list of 100 things I love
82. Cook a 5 course meal for family and friends
83. Grow my own herbs
84. Go to an IKEA
85. Update the  blog tracking my journey
86. Learn to cook an ethnicity I’m unfamiliar with
87. Go on a cruise
88. Start saving money for my wedding (If God doesn’t want me to get married I’ll do something good with the money I saved)
89. Ride a horse
90. Go on a carriage ride downtown and in Central Park
91. Go to 5 restaurants featured on Diners, Drive Ins, and Dives (0/5)
92. Go to Lady & Sons in Savannah
93. Buy a white Christmas tree and decorate it like I want
94. Help my Mom and Wilson make a list
95. Call my grandmother once a month (0/35)
96. Learn to play golf
97. Take part in the polar bear swim
98. Eat at Vapianos
99. Save money and buy tickets to the Olympics Opening Ceremony
100. Throw a dart on a map of South Carolina and visit somewhere I’ve never been
101. Make a new List!!

Wish me luck! And please by all means hold me accountable and help me complete them

Light at Night

Tonight I went to Light at Night at church. I am volunteering with Cross Bridge this summer. At first I felt very discouraged about the group. Its a group of us meeting throughout the summer. After the first meeting I didn’t feel like I had been taken seriously because of my age. I felt like they were merely trying to appease me. I didn’t know what else to do. Here I am a 20 year old spending my free time and nights hanging out with a group of people all over the age of 40. I felt very defeated after eating dinner with all of them. Especially because I knew that this is what I am supposed to be doing with my summer. I have a huge passion for people who are sick and just want to help them in any way I can. I spent some time praying and continued to go to the meetings. Well tonight was a huge prayer answered. I was picked to provide a home cooked meal for the family of a little girl in the hospital. I love to cook so this form of serving is perfect! Also on Sunday I get to go with some of the people to pray with a few of the families! Please be praying that God will prepare my heart to serve him, that I will put the problems of my life aside and fully focus on these families whose lives have been turned upside down, and finally pray that I will be a good example of Christ’s love (many of the families Crossbridge helps aren’t Christians). I will go into more detail on the families and how is goes on Sunday.